Log in

No account? Create an account

BErKaNa: Growth. Rebirth. Birch Tree.

small, beautiful things

January 4th, 2010

Transitions, Feh. @ 09:14 pm

Place: red chaise
Emotions: amused amused

I have to say, this wanting to go to sleep in her own bed thing is REALLY harshing my mellow. I mean, I want Maeve to be independent, and to have her own space and be her own person. Certainly she exhibits all the talent a 3-yr-old can muster in that direction. That said, we (shhhh! dirty secret ahead) still co-sleep. That's right, family bed and all.

And, night nurse. Not as in Nurse Betty, sassy Night Nurse, but as in the kidlet still gets her nummies when she needs them. Some nights, not at all. Other nights, like last night that was full of bad dreams, thrashing and general discomfort on her part -- lots of nursing.

*Shrug* I'm fine with it, and know that this will be the year of the weaning. To whit, the last week or so, she's decided it's time for her to nap/sleep in her own room/bed at night. The crib we never used has been converted to a toddler bed with high sides, and has functioned as a clothes container in the early days, transitioning to stuffed animal holder in later days. Maeve's gotten some good jumping in on that mattress, and now, it's cleared for sleeping, or at least pretending to.

The problem is, as I remember only too clearly from being little myself, is it is hard to fall asleep on your own. It seems fun a first, but without a cozy body next to you, you get to thinking, and flumping around, and soon enough, you hop out and seek out a parental unit. God, I certainly recall my parents' chagrin, night after night, "GO BACK TO BED!" to my, "But, Moooooommmmy, I neeeeeed you." I had (er, have) an extremely active imagination that my child inherited, and it far outweighed any exhausted state. Ritual, and cuddling, helped me relax, feel safe, let go. Sleep held many scary things for me, and though I hope that never will be handed down, there's not too much I can do about her dream content, and what wakes her in the night.

But I digress. She wants to sleep in her own bed. Fine. She's in and out of that bed in a half hour more times than a flea transfers from dog to dog in a pack. And, I only have so much patience, but don't want to holler at her over something as simple as sleep. Naptime today we had a good compromise -- she nursed while cuddling with me on the couch, and as soon as she drifted off, I transferred her to her bed. When she woke up in the middle of her nap, as she always does, I asked her if she wanted to go to the big bed to cuddle, and she said yes, and fell back asleep for another 1.5 hrs. Not bad, and no angst. Today.

Tonight, I tossed bedtime to my ever-loving partner, who tends to be the less patient of the two of us around bedtimes, but also, to be fair, can surprise me. I read the book, he took her to her bed, went in twice to her calls, and brought water. Then I heard some kerfluffle, and him ordering, "FINE! Get out of bed. Get your socks!"

Whu whut?

She explained to me that the cat's meowing kept her awake, and that she really was just having a hard time falling asleep, and that Daddy was going to drive her in the car to help her fall asleep. "Daddy really doesn't want to do it," she said, "But I asked him, and he got a little happier. And, I solved the problem!"

*Chuckle* And here I am, on the computer, eating a delicious homemade cookie leftover from the holidays while they drive around looking for the Sandman. Seriously, though I'm bitching about transitions, I need to just enjoy this moment. One way or another we'll figure it out. It's the same thing any time she reaches for a new level -- often more painful for us as parents in shifting gears and getting used to a new normal than it is for her, who's just going with the flow.

Share  |  |


BErKaNa: Growth. Rebirth. Birch Tree.

small, beautiful things